Wednesday, January 11, 2012

The Lord's sorrow and anger

A fox wailed loudly from Lord Rama’s hind
This ominous happening shook Lord Rama’s mind
Lord Rama walked towards the ashram in a hurried pace
Desperate sweat poured down from His darkened face

That His wife would not have sent His brother, Lord Rama hoped
In walks and runs with an unsteady mind, Lord Rama loped
On the way, Lord Rama came upon a sight
Seeing which, Lord Rama froze in fright

Lakshman was strolling with his head down
In his always humble face there was a thoughtful frown
There was no more enthusiasm left in his nerves
He swayed his bow, aimlessly, on the ground in curves

As He walked, Lord Rama called out to His brother as if to wake
Lakshman lifted up his head, giving to his thoughtfulness, a break
Lakshman’s face showed fears of disapproval from His Lord
As if accepting a failure and a mistake, he stood in accord

“Where is Sita, Lakshman?! What are you doing here?
To leave Her alone in the ashram, have you no fear?
To be on Her guard, till I come back, did I not tell?
Your action increases My fear that something is not well!”

“Brother! Mother commanded me to come to Your aid
On hearing Your voice call us, She was very much afraid
I knew it is not in Your nature to call anyone for help
But, the fear of losing You, Mother Sita could not gulp!”

“Knowing it’s just Her fear, why did you take it seriously?
What if something happens to Her, in Our absence, grievously?
Why did you not try to convince Her otherwise
That to fear about My safety is not very wise?”

Lakshman stood silently for sometime and then started to speak
The reason, as to why his determination to stay back, became weak
“Brother! Mother was angry with me when I wouldn’t go
Accusations regarding my character, She tried to throw

She accused me of coveting Her, and it very much pained
She accused me of awaiting Your death, and yet I remained
Hoping, the rightness in my decision, She would soon know
And that all Her anger, on seeing You, would melt like snow

But then, on seeing me so stubborn, Her suspicion and fear grew
With much firmness, Your sword from its sheath, She swiftly drew
Pointing it to Her chest, She threatened to thrust
My clarity of thinking was immediately bust

I fell at Her reverent Feet, crying and pleading
Telling Her to stop and that I was heeding
Only after I got ready with my weapons, the sword, She dropped
Her bitter crying, angry scolding, and vehement threatening, She stopped”

Unable to control anymore, Lakshman poured out his grief
Shedding tears, and dejected, He expressed his feelings, brief
“After all the years of service, this is the trust I earned
Being accused of betrayal, my heart is completely burnt”

Lord Rama hugged Lakshman and patted on his cheek
And tried to cheer him telling him not to be so weak
“She has spoken out of fear; do not take it to heart
You know, none can think of Me, leaving you apart

When She wanted to join Me in exile, She accused Me too
Women use tears and emotional words to get their points, through
Taking that to heart please do not get dejected or sad
Praiseful words for you, before Me, She has always had

When I tried to send you back home, did She not support you?
Only because of a wife’s fear, She has behaved, startling and new”
Lakshman, on hearing Lord Rama speak thus, dropped all his depression
Lakshman smiled at Lord Rama with a childlike and happy expression

“Brother! I am sorry I was affected by criticism and got distracted
Without getting hurt by passing anger, my duty, I must have enacted
I must have climbed some tree and watched the ashram without fail
Now I feel bad for coming all the way, dejected, with a heart so frail”

Both of their spirits were lifted by each other’s understanding and love
Both of them were walking towards the ashram in runs and walks, now
Lord Rama told Lakshman that He would pinch Mother Sita’s ears for sure
And make Her do Thoppukaranam before Lakshman, for Her obstinacy to cure

Talking thus Lord Rama and Lakshman laughed
In quite sometime, the distance was almost halved
Lord Rama asked Lakshman about the time he left
On hearing which Lord Rama’s hope was bereft

Lakshman had left the ashram more than an hour ago
More than five to six kilometer distance they had to go
They walked and ran fast, not talking much
Praying, They must see Mother Sita as such

Lord Rama’s intuition was ringing an uneasy alarm
Shaking off His fears, He tried to keep His mind calm
In the next thirty minutes, to the ashram, they were near
Unable to believe what they saw, They Both froze in fear

The plantain trees before the ashram were fallen
Flowers were scattered everywhere with their pollen
The fence at the entrance was, towards the ground, leaning
Lord Rama and Lakshman fearfully contemplated the meaning

As if for Their lives, towards the ashram, They ran
Calling out to Mother Sita as loud as They can
But to Their heartbreaking dismay, there was no response
Threatening silence was everywhere, sitting in an ensconce

Lord Rama knelt before the ashram catching His head
Lakshman could not think of words that could be said
Asking Lord Rama to rise, Lakshman stood by His flank
Lord Rama heard or saw nothing, as all for Him was blank

Lord Rama then, opened His eyes and looked everywhere
As if trying to find out, where He and His brother were
Just a moment went by and His memory was flooded
Lord Rama realised He was in the situation, He dreaded

As if pushed by a sudden impulse , He arose and ran
In, out, and around the ashram, like a crazy man
What ever He saw that moment, His tears did shroud
As if, like a blind man for help, He shouted loud

He rotated and revolved, like earth, around His favourite hut
To Him, all doors for a meaningful life ahead was fully shut
His wife, His only attachment, from Him was snatched
Any ray of hope, about getting Her back, was thatched

With hope, He ran to the river bank to see
Thinking, fetching water, His Wife could be
All He could see was the empty bank and flowing waters
Flowing nonchalantly, as if to tell Him, it could not care less

He ran into the woods where they usually walked
And looking everywhere, unto the air, He talked
“Sita! Dear! Just for fun, are You hiding anywhere
If that is so, please come out, I am unable to bear

To see Your Face and Smile, My Heart yearns
Clouded by fearful smokes, My Heart burns
I feel like my head is going to anytime burst
I don’t think life can become anymore worst

Why fate targets Me again and again and treats Me so unkind?
Why does it snatch from Me my loved ones, leaving none behind?
What sin have I committed that I can love no one for very long?
Previous birth, I must have been a sinner and acted very wrong

I had to walk away from My father while he bitterly cried
I could not be at his side, to caress his chest, while he died
I could not give a shoulder when his body was kept on pyre
Though being the eldest son, I was not there to light the fire

I had to send back the people, both young and old
They came to Me out of love but I had to remain cold
Bharatha came to Me, renouncing all comfort, like dust
But separation from Me, upon him, I had to thrust

Why was I not born as a farmer, who happily ploughs the land?
I would’ve gone back home, everyday, holding My Wife’s Hand
As a Prince, with high responsibilities, why was I born?
Is it only to be caught in inextricable situations and get torn?

Why was I gifted with brothers and wife, so loving?
And then, why am I forced into separation and lonely living?
If only I was born as an orphan would I know, ‘what is love?’
If only I never knew that, would I have to lament like this now?

Why does this fate, as if by random wish, give and take
By torturing innocent men like this, what does it make?
Why was I not born as a tree in the forest whose life is so good?
Dancing in the breeze and giving shade, I could have happily stood

When my life, to me, is a burden
What service, can I offer men?
Was I born only to suffer?
Why does death, from me, defer?”

Saying thus and more, Lord Rama cried out like an orphan
Lakshman caressed His chest and head and consoled Him often
Lakshman too had run about the ashram surroundings in search
He noticed, brave Jatayu too was not seen, in his usual tree, perch

After much crying, Lord Rama laid down on the ground
And remained there for long without a word or sound
Like a baby in the womb with folded legs, He lay on his side
As if wanting the earth to open and forever take Him inside

Not wanting to hear anything, He closed His ears
From His tightly shut eyes, flowed river-like tears
Lakshman sat by His side and begged Him to take courage
Reminding Him, how all problems in life, are just a mirage

“To handle the situation at hand, this is not the attitude
We must act now and find Mother Sita, with fortitude
We cannot find Her, if You lie like a bird without a wing
You must use Your valour and wisdom, being a ‘to be king’”

The words, ‘find Mother Sita’, stirred Lord Rama again
It was like a balm applied to soothe His unbearable pain
Lord Rama after long arose from the ground and sat
Tears flowed for long from His eyes that did not bat

After sometime, He composed Himself and wiped His tears
Gathering hope, He decided to keep at bay His sorrows and fears
He stood up slowly and walked mustering His formidable will
On finding what had happened, He fixed His thinking skill

The Brothers went to the ashram observing everything on the way
The ashram animals gathered around, as if they wanted to say
Lakshman told Lord Rama that even Jatayu was not seen
Nodding thoughtfully to Lakshman, Lord Rama’s eyes were keen

Lord Rama noticed a sage’s ochre robs lie on the ground
White pearls, not belonging to Mother Sita’s jewels, were found
Within the fence, Lord Rama saw new and big foot marks deeply sagged
From the ashram to the fence, marks showed, someone was dragged

Lord Rama remembered the king, Maricha had mentioned while dying
He realised it was that king’s plan to defeat Him, without face to face vying
Outside the fence, there was a large square mark on the land
A square so large, within which, about hundred men could stand

Just before the square, the drag marks and foot marks ended
As to what would have happened, some light They rendered
Lord Rama first thought, ‘the mark was made by a palanquin’s pressing’
There were no foot marks of its carriers to support Lord Rama’s guessing

“Lakshman, the square mark shows something heavy stood there
But I am unable to guess, how the abductor of Sita brought it there
The land around shows no mark of people’s or animals’ feet
Without anyone carrying it, how was it lifted from its seat?”

To Lord Rama’s question, Lakshman thoughtfully nodded
His conclusion about the scene, Lakshman thoughtfully added
“Brother! I don’t think there was more than one man here
Seeing the same foot steps everywhere, this to me is clear”

Lord Rama too felt Lakshman’s guessing was right
He wondered if there was an object that could take flight
Thinking about all this, His anger enormously grew
With much determination, fire like words He threw

“Somebody is being very desperate, to die at My hand
He wants to destroy himself, his people, and his land
If only I don’t get back My Sita, as I saw last
I will destroy this entire creation that is vast

I will make the Gods, I humbly worshipped, beg and plead
For silently easing and watching from heavens, this anarchic deed
If I do not get an explanation for making Me suffer thus
My arrows with deadly mantras will create unlimited fuss

I will crush the king to a painful death for crossing my path
Even Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva cannot escape my wrath
What works do these God’s have other than protecting a man of truth?
Always being worshipped and pampered, they remain silent without ruth!

I will force these Gods who are so high
To come down and give me a humble reply
First, I will kill that cowardly demon king in war
Then for my arrows, those heavens will not be far”

Saying thus Lord Rama fumed unable to control His rage
Lakshman had never seen Lord Rama like that all his age
Lakshman, himself fuming in anger, knew not what to say
He silently remained, leaving Lord Rama be His way

Lord Rama then composed Himself and decided to go ahead
In search of His angel who His good fortune made Him wed
The Brothers got up discussing in which direction they would go
The ashram animals gathered around as if they wanted to show

They ran towards the south and looked back at Ram
They lifted their heads pointing to the sky that was calm
Thus another arduous and enlightening journey began in the noble life of Ram
As the animals sadly watched Him, thinking, ‘Jai Shri Ram! Jai Jai Shri Ram!!’

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